Ryan Paulson

On Tuesday I got home from 9 days in Mexico. Our college ministry, theWELL, spent a total of 15 days in two different regions of Mexico. We worked with very different people in each place and were involved in different types of ministry. I the next few days I am going to write some different posts that reflect on some of the things that I learned and was challenged by during my 9 days in Mexico.

The first thing I learned is that some people are high maintenance. Okay, let me be a little bit more specific; I AM HIGH MAINTENANCE. I had the opportunity to spend time with some of the missionaries that we partnered with before the rest of the team made it on bus and I was shocked/encouraged/motivated by the amount of things that they have given up in order to hold out the gospel to the Purepecha people. Things like being unable to attend the funerals of loved ones, like living in homes without running water… and the list could go on. Immediately I was reminded that their lives are very different than the comfortable life that I live in the states.

My high maintenance(ness) was challenged on the first night when one of the people on the trip woke me up and said that the place we were staying had run out of water. I said, “Okay, let’s take a look at it in the morning…” He responded by saying, “…and most of the team is sick with diarrhea.” Those are two statements that no one wants to hear together. If said separately, one can deal with it; but when they are said together you have a serious problem on your hands. And we did have a serious problem on our hands! I realized that I don’t like going to the bathroom when there is no way to flush the toilet. I realized that I really don’t like going to the bathroom, when there is no way to flush the toilet… and you are sharing it with 10 other people! But I started to to wonder, “How much of the rest of the world lives this way? I mean, this is normal for some/many people in our world. I AM HIGH MAINTENANCE.

There was one night on the trip where the place we were supposed to stay (for the next 4 days) fell through. The person who was supposed to unlock the door got sick and was stuck in another village. That means we were forced to go to plan B; unfortunately, plan B did not exist. The people we were working with found us a place to stay – the guys shared someone’s living room and 10 girls were in a room smaller than my son’s room. It was pretty tight quarters… and we all (20 of us) shared one shower. I realized that I like my space. Not only that, but we were woken up throughout the night by donkeys who were going crazy and then we were awoken in the morning at 6:30 by announcements being made over the loud speakers that were in town. It was so annoying, and I realized once again that I AM HIGH MAINTENANCE .

One of the scriptures that just came alive to me during my 9 days in MX was Philippians 4:10-13 which reads,

¹⁰I rejoice greatly in the Lord that at last you have renewed your concern for me. Indeed, you have been concerned, but you had no opportunity to show it. ¹¹I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. ¹²I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. ¹³I can do everything through him who gives me strength.

The part of it that stands out to me is that Paul says he has learned to be content in any and every situation. I love that. I love that he admits that it didn’t come naturally to him, and he encourages us that through the grace of God it is possible. The “everything” that he refers to in v.13 (probably the verse that is taken out of context more than any other in scripture – thanks Tebow) is being content. He is saying that he is so confident in his relationship with God that he doesn’t care what this world throws at him; he will be content. Well, the world threw jail at him, shipwrecks, nakedness, hunger, crucifixion, etc. And he remained content. So, in the midst of non-flushing toilets, donkeys dying in the streets in the middle of the night, random announcements being made over loud speakers at crazy hours of the morning, and sleeping situations that we didn’t expect; I was challenged to find my contentment in Christ alone. I was encouraged to be content in him in any and every situation – and I was given a chance to learn how to do this. I found out that it is easier said than done.

And, I was reminded that I AM HIGH MAINTENANCE. I think God broke me of a little of that last week. Hopefully it’s only the beginning of the journey.

Next Mexico post – “Why religion sucks!”

For college ministries, the most important week of the year is rapidly approaching. It’s the first week of school! It’s the time when the largest number of students are open to and looking for new things to be involved in. It’s the time of year when we will have the largest number of new students who attend our ministry. Even though we are in a largely commuter students population, I have still found this to be true.

So, before I head out on our mission trip, I am trying to get everything in order to have effective kick-offs at both CSUSM and Palomar. I really count this part of my job an honor. I love being involved on campuses and in the lives of college students.

This year we will have booths set up at both Cal State SM and Palomar. We will have welcome boxes from our church in every dorm room at Cal State, we will be helping people move into the dorms, etc. I’m really excited to hold out the open and abundant life of the gospel to the local campuses.

Let’s get this party started!

I just got back from a great run at Lake Hodges. Awesome. I run about. 4+ mile loop there. The way out was great, but on the way back there was some guy that obviously ran cross country who passed me on the trail. He was flying! Now, I’m a pretty competitive guy, so I was like “oh no you don’t cross country guy!” He just seemed to glide down the trial while I was running with all my might.

The rest of the run I was trying to catch him. He had no idea that we were racing and he still kicked my butt. I never caught him. I wanted to congratulate him on his win when we got back to the car, but he was already gone. While I never did catch Mr. Front-runner, I did beat my best time on that trail by 2 mins.

I realized something on that run. We all need frontrunners in our lives. We need people who are going to challenge us to run faster and chase harder. I’m praying that God will raise up more frontrunners at theWell. I want more people who are chasing after Jesus at a pace that encourages others to run faster and harder! Paul said, follow me as I follow Christ (1 Cor. 11:1). I want to live with that kind of confidence and enthusiasm.

You may have won this time Mr Frontrunner. But thanks for the push! Maybe I’ll get you next time… if I have a really big head start.

Tonight I am starting a new series at theWELL called Summer Lovin’. We are going though the book of Song of Songs and I can’t wait. I think relationships are one of the greatest gifts that God has given humanity, but it’s also one of the things that we screw up the most. I’m really excited for the practical nature of the book of Songs of Songs – the way that it address what type of people we should be attracted to and looking for, how to date well… and a bunch of other fun stuff!

It’s so funny to me because I have been teaching Romans in our main service (at EFCC) for the past 2 weeks and now I will be teaching Song of Songs Sunday night. They couldn’t be more different! But, this is one of the things that I love about being a pastor. The Word of God is so deep and so rich that it really does address all areas of life.

Grateful for God’s Word today!

I finished our series last night on the life of Jacob that we called Identity Theft. I was really fun to address the issue of identity through the life of Jacob and to see the way that his journey with God over the years formed and shaped who he was. Last night we ended with the story of Jacob wrestling with God (Genesis 32) and eventually receiving a new name from him. It’s a beautiful culmination to the story – because the way the story starts is by Jacob lying about his name, the way it ends is with God giving him a new name. It’s a picture of redemption and hope.

Anyway, as part of the message I handed out a pretty famous list of what the Bible says about us – it’s called “Who I am in Christ.” It’s really what the whole series pointed to – that we need to look to God to define us, not the world around us. It was really interesting – someone handed back in the handout that I gave out (the one about who we are in Christ) with the written objection stating (amongst other things), “I think that instead of having this paper to show us who we are, I think it should be about God and Jesus Christ, and through him we find ourselves… It’s not about us!!” It’s funny because the whole handout is about who God has made us to be.

I completely agree on some levels that it’s not about us, but I wonder if it’s possible to take that idea too far. I guess I have to wonder which of the scriptures listed on the sheet the person disagrees with? Which one of those are we not supposed to focus on? I thought that all scripture was God-breathed and useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness (2 Tim 3:16). I agree that it is nothing of ourselves that makes us lovely, but is it wrong to focus on the fact that God loves his creation and to rejoice in that fact? It seems to me that the Bible makes a big deal out of that truth, that we are loved by God… and that it’s a truth that is supposed to transform us.

Often times Christians spend a lot of time focusing on how bad we are and not the other side of the coin… that in spite of our sin, we are loved by a great God (Romans 5:8). It’s interesting to do a study of the way that Paul refers to people in the church throughout his letters in the new testament. He refers to them as saints… not sinners. This person went on to object,

“It’s not about us being loved, it’s about a God who loves a horrible, wretched, deceiving, lustful, liar, human being! It’s when we realize how unlovable we are, then we see God’s true love.”

There are a few (more than that, but we’ll start there) problems with this theology – the least of which is that it is functionally impossible to separate these two things (it is about a God who loves, but it’s also about the people that he loves!). That’s why the Bible talks a lot about the people whom God loves and the way that we are supposed to imitate that love. Here are a few issues that I see with this line of thinking:

First, we fail to affirm the whole of scripture and the portions that teach that we are people, created in the image of God (Gen 1:27), and that all life is significant… even our very own. Why is that something we feel we have to rob ourselves of (and the rest of humanity for that matter) in order to elevate God? If, like this person suggests we simply need to focus on God, why does Jesus spend so much time addressing the way we treat other people? If it’s really only all about God, why did Jesus teach his followers to love our neighbors and enemies, to forgive other people, to turn the other cheek, etc. Jesus taught that the first/greatest command was to love God. But, in the next breath he said that the second greatest was like it… to love other people! (Matt 22) Now, if we are to love God because he is ultimately lovable and worthy of our love (which I would wholeheartedly agree that he is), why are we to love others? Could it be that they are worthy of love also? Jesus doesn’t say, “love others even though they are wretched people unworthy of love,” does he? Now, if that is true about other people (that we should love them), and we always affirm that it is (that’s why we hate abortion, genocide, murder, etc. – because people have value) why would it not be true about ourselves? And if it is true about ourselves, why are we afraid to state it? I get it, we don’t want to make the story about us… and I agree with that. But God has invited us to play a part in History. It’s part of his grace! Not only that, but he says that when we trust him and know him, then we are made “new creations” (2 Cor 5:17). So, at least that point do we gain worth?

The second objection I have is that when we simply keep reminding ourselves that we are garbage and unworthy of love, we live up to that image. We always live out what we really think about ourselves. That’s why Neil Anderson wrote, “The more you reaffirm who you are in Christ, the more your behavior will begin to reflect your true identity!” That is so true, and the opposite of that is true as well. The more we remind ourselves that we are failures, the more we will fail. The more we remind ourselves that we are sinners, the more we live up to that name (probably why Paul refers to us as saints at the beginning of nearly every epistle he writes). Not only that, but the book of Ephesians (amongst others) claims that we are His (god’s) inheritance (Deut 32:9, Ps 33:12, 1 Pt 2:9, ***Eph 1:18). So, if people are garbage and unworthy of love, then so is God’s inheritance.

So, to the person who thinks it threatens God’s greatness to affirm that his creation is lovable, I’m sorry. God is not threatened by that. It does not rob him of the glory that is due him. I think it is impossible to function healthily with that view of yourself… it’s sad that many people do – that’s why we see things like suicide, people giving themselves to other people sexually, and self-mutilation at such an alarming rate. As the church, my desire is that we would hold out a greater hope! That we would affirm the God-given value of all people… includes ourselves.

Is it possible that we are lovable simply because we were created by God? Not because we earned it, we didn’t, but because he is our maker. Could that in and of itself be enough? Could that be why he loves us enough to send his son to die for us?

I think so… I’d love to hear responses from anyone who has thoughts on the matter – even if you disagree!!!

The first part of this summer I have had the chance to play a lot of golf. It was one of my New Year’s resolutions, so I’m glad to say that I have kept one of them. I think it’s mostly because I am out of Seminary (finally!) and have a few extra hours per week at my disposal. Kelly and I traveled to Myrtle Beach for a week with Kelly’s parents and I got to play a few round there, and then this 4th of July weekend I played a few times around Escondido. It’s amazing how much that can help your game.

Anyway, I never really kept a “real” score in golf. I would give myself extra shots, dropped balls whenever I couldn’t find one… A few weeks ago i decided that i wanted to know where I was really at, so I kept a real score. It was a little bit scary, but I learned a few things through it. I started to actually think about each shot, knowing that I was going to count it (no matter where it went or if I could find it).

I did one other thing that completely changed the way that I play golf. I stopped carrying an extra ball in my pocket! Now, I know that doesn’t seem like all that big of a deal, but for me it has made all the difference in the world. Carrying around an extra ball is a way of admitting, “I know I’m going to fail, so I just want to be prepared when I do.” That extra ball used shift around in my pocket reminding me that I really suck at golf and that in a few shots I was going to need its services. So, I stopped carrying that extra ball. Now, that doesn’t mean I never lose balls now (I do lose less though!), but it means that I am not expecting to fail. What a concept!

I wonder how many of us walk through life expecting to fail. I wonder how many of us walk through life with a pocket full of extra balls, just writing for the rug to be pulled out and for us to need to drop another ball. I stopped doing it in golf, and I’m going to stop doing it in life too!

I was rereading The Reason for God by Tim Keller recently and came across a quote that really hit me. It was in a section of the book where we was talking about how substitution is at the heart of Christianity. In it, he quotes John Stott’s book The Cross of Christ. In it he writes,

“The essence of sin is we human beings substituting ourselves for God, while the essence of salvation is God substituting himself for us. We… put ourselves where God deserves to be; God… puts himself where we deserved to be.”

What a great reminder of the extent of our trespass and the unreal mercy of God.

I am taking a class called Discipleship in Community this quarter at Seminary. One of the books we are reading for the class is Life Together by Dietrich Bonhoeffer. I ran across a great quote in the book. He wrote:

By sheer grace, God will not permit us to live even for a brief period in a dream world. He does not abandon us to those rapturous experiences and lofty moods that come over us like a dream. God is not a God of the emotions but the God of truth. Only that fellowship which faces such disillusionment, with all its unhappy and ugly aspects, begins to be what it should be in God’s sight, begins to grasp in faith the promise that is given to it.

The sooner this shock of disillusionment comes to an individual and to a community, the better for both. A community which cannot bear and cannot survive such a crisis, which insists upon keeping its illusion when it should be shattered, permanently loses in that moment the promise of Christian community. Sooner or later it will collapse. Every human wish dream that is injected into the Christian community is a hindrance to genuine community and must be banished if genuine community is to survive. He who loves his dream of a community more that the Christian community itself becomes a destroyer of the latter, even though his personal intentions may be ever so honest and earnest and sacrificial.

Wow! Challenging quote.

Is it possible that baseball opening day 2010 holds the best play of the season to come? Check out this unreal play!

I found this video via Rob Bell’s tweet about it last night. It’s very typical Rob Bell. Well done, he makes many good points, and its very inspiring. However, it’s also very Rob Bell in the sense that it doesn’t share the whole story. He doesn’t mention at all the fact that in rising from the dead Jesus conquered sin and death – paying the penalty that we all rightfully deserved. Anyway, I’d love to hear your thoughts!

And, did that video remind anyone else of this masterpiece (below)? I’m not sure why it made me think of this, but it did. So take that!